I Lost Myself, After Losing You. (Confession)

I won’t lookback to this year ever, I would prefer not to be with the harsh memories of life in future. This year snatched most of my beautiful things from me. I remember, those two beautiful people of my life who were with me while my bad times, they both adored me like a child, they never makes me feel unworthy or burden on this society as others did. When nobody was near me to listen my pain, those two people listend me without being judgemental, they both showerd thier love like a mother venerate her kid, they never needed anything consequently. The greater part of the times when I felt lonely and broken, they both made me relaised that I am an special soul and pushed me to comeout from my trouble. At the point when blood relations repuffed me they grasped me without posing any question.

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However, what I did to them.?

I betryaed them, whatever was the reason yet I think I lost them. I feel lost in myself in the wake of losing them. I underestimated their Love for me. I never wanted to lose them, I never wantee to be distant from everyone else again but like always I lost with time. Time pushed me into the zone of Cancer. A Cancer prevalently know as ‘Depressiom’. My anxiety, My misery, dismembered me from everything. Subsequent to battling following numerous years with misery I went to my breaking point, where I began hating myself. I never needed anybody to endure with my issues so I kept myself, yet when I understood, I am losing some special persons it was past the point of no return. Depression was my greatest foe ever and I lose with it at each phase of my life. Depressiom won over me, it destroyed my relationship with these two lovely souls. Depression grabbed my happiness, my life, and gave me lonliness. I am not pointing the finger at depression for this circumstance, It was just me who killed myself and let depression win, but whoever was the offender possibly me or depression, the conclusion is, I lost these people. I need them back in my life, I tried to let them know but wind up in nervousness of being wrong. I don’t know I will get them in my life again but one thing I know, I never wanted this to happen, I never wanted to get separated from them.

                                      मेरे एहबाब मेरे दोस्त सब ले गया
                                      ए गुए साल तू लौट के मत आना !!

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